In many instances, divorce is messy, protracted, and expensive. The main reason for this is the emotional pain spouses may experience but refuse to admit. Usually, each party goes all out to fight for full custody over kids, money, and property, among many others. Unfortunately, many divorces are unexpected, with 876,000 divorce cases annually. Below are some tips on minimizing or avoiding chaos during a divorce.
Consider using the collaborative approach
This is a non-confrontational way to resolve disputes likely to arise in a divorce. Usually, the family lawyer or mediator will set boundaries agreed to by both parties. The mediator will take further steps to ensure the spouses respect the limits and each other’s wishes. The collaborative approach ensures that the decisions arrived at are favorable to all parties. Especially when children are involved, it becomes mandatory to make decisions that enhance their safety, security, and mental health.
There is debate about the cost of family lawyers who adopt the collaborative approach. And fortunately, you can explore other affordable mediation options. Start by doing your checks on the family lawyer or the firm you want to handle the mediation process. This will provide ample information about them and their style of approach in matters like yours. Some prefer to use a litigious stance which may not be ideal for achieving the desired outcome. You want a smooth process and faith in the attorney’s collaborative approach to prevent a messy divorce.
Engage with your spouse only when necessary
Some advice against any form of communication between the spouses during a divorce. However, this may become fertile ground for increased animosity and antagonism. More so, when children are involved, it may be crucial to maintain some level of open communication to avoid further conflict. This is why it may be better to engage your former spouse only when necessary. You have the option to communicate with them through your attorney, but that may only increase your legal fees.
This is why it may be advisable to use a better approach like minimal engagement. The only caveat here is when it is an abusive or violent relationship. In this case, it may require putting an abrupt end to all forms of communication during the divorce process.
File an unreasonable behavior petition only when required
According to family lawyers, some couples abuse the unreasonable behavior petition option. Usually, one couple issues or files for this petition out of spite and with an unfounded desire to hurt the other. When this petition is filed, it becomes fertile grounds for a messy divorce, especially as the alleged party feels aggrieved.
It is, therefore, advisable to file for an unreasonable behavior petition only when your attorney advises. Moreover, if the court discovers that you filed a baseless allegation, it may not help your case in the long run.
Lastly, you may want to avoid disposing of your assets before the divorce is granted. That can be another hotbed for a messy divorce process.