Even the strongest relationships can experience difficulties over time. However, there are occasions when a married couple’s problems are more than minor setbacks and instead represent substantial challenges that put the entire partnership in jeopardy. When this happens, it’s natural to start looking for warning signs that your marriage is doomed. It might not always be the case that you have to go towards divorce, but sometimes it can be for the best – here are some of the signs to look out for.
There Is Contempt When You Talk
Each and every couple has arguments. And, in the heat of an argument, everyone is guilty of saying things they later come to regret. But it becomes problematic when there is actual animosity behind the criticism. Real contempt for another person entails treating them with disdain and disregard.
For a marriage to succeed, mutual respect must be present at all times, including when each partner is feeling frustrated or angry. If one partner in the marriage comes to view the other as undeserving of respect, the relationship between them is doomed to fail.
There Is Emotional Distance
The separation between the spouses emotionally is an early indicator of an impending divorce. When people stop talking to each other, they stop sharing their deepest ideas and emotions. The result is internalized feelings of resentment, bitterness, and rage.
Even if spouses make an effort to reconnect by going on dates or enjoying vacations together, these initiatives frequently fail. The reason for this is that the problems that lead to emotional distance cannot be fixed unless they are addressed. If a couple can’t accomplish this, their marriage will likely continue to deteriorate, and they might even wind up divorcing and needing top rated family law attorneys to make that process go as smoothly as possible.
You’re Spending Less Time Together
You don’t have to spend every waking minute together – in fact, that’s not a good thing when it comes to the health of your relationship either – but you should want to spend some time with one another.
It’s okay to spend the night in front of the TV watching something by yourself, lose yourself in a book, stay at the office late, go out with your friends, or have your own hobbies, but you need to manage your time so that you do things together as well. One of the warning signs of a failing marriage is turning to distractions like these rather than working through the problems you’re having as a couple. A healthy marriage requires consistent quality time spent together doing things you both enjoy.
There Has Been Infidelity
If either you or your partner has cheated on the other, it might be hard to move forward in your marriage. Still, a lot of the time, it depends on how bad the cheating was. For instance, it can be very hard to move on from chronic infidelity.
But if the cheating was one-time or small, like a drunken kiss at a bar instead of repeated sex with a lover, it might be easier for you to move on. All of this depends on how bad you think cheating is in general, and everyone has a different opinion on that.
You Complain To Your Friends
When you go out with your friends, what do you talk about? When you chat on the phone or text one another, what’s the subject that often comes up? If it’s your relationship, that’s not unusual – in fact, relationships are something many people like to talk about to get advice or provide information. It’s a big part of our lives and a big commitment, so it makes sense that you would talk about it often.
So it’s not that you’re talking about your relationship, it’s what you’re saying about it. If you always have bad things to say and you complain more than you talk about positive things, maybe it’s time to think about your relationship and what you really think about it. Could it be that a separation or divorce is necessary if you can only ever think of the negative side of things?
You’re Less Interested In Being Intimate
The novelty of a fresh relationship wears off, our bodies age, and we feel less energized. All of this messes with your libido. It’s a fact of life. Couples have less sex on average as time goes on, that much is certain. On the other hand, in a happy marriage, both partners still want to have sexual relations on a regular basis, even if it’s not that often. A relationship is in trouble if the partners no longer find pleasure in one another sexually or emotionally.
You’re More Like Roommates
When a husband and wife begin treating each other more like roommates than spouses, it can be an indication that their marriage is in peril. They might stop spending time together, stop talking to each other about anything other than household necessities, and even start sleeping in separate bedrooms. For some couples, being friends is the best option since their personalities mesh better than continuing as romantic partners.
However, there are situations in which it is a symptom of more serious issues. The problems of isolation and resentment that arise from a breakdown in communication and closeness within a couple are major contributors to the breakdown of marriages. If you feel like your relationship is drifting apart, it’s time to work on your communication and reconnect. If not, you can end up on the path to divorce.
You’re Generally Unhappy
If you wake up next to your partner every day knowing that you’re unhappy in your marriage, that’s a sign that your relationship isn’t doing well.
You don’t have to be actively happy all the time when you’re married, but if you never feel happy and always feel sad or disappointed when you’re together, that’s a pretty clear sign you’re not in a great place, and divorce might be the best option for you. Happiness is so important in life that you need to choose it, even if it’s a hard path to get there.