Today we’ve got a fun “what if” guest post about some of our most beloved characters from the movies. It made THIS broad (Broad Z) scratch her head and think for a minute.
When you’re solidly invested into a film franchise or have really bought into a character, it’s weird to imagine them doing something outside of their role. The recent plethora of amusing collections of Game of Thrones actors out and about in their normal clothes doing normal things has proven a dichotomy solid enough to blow fans’ minds. It got us thinking about other characters and how weird it would be to see them outside of their normal environment. And just for kicks, we have made up a load of possible and, we feel, plausible, scenarios for five iconic movie figures.
1. DECKARD KICKS BACK WITH A ROMANCE NOVEL
It’s a little known secret that Blade Runner’s tough as nails cop has a weakness for chick lit. Yep, it’s true. In his downtime, when he’s not chasing replicants around in the rain, you can find him sat in his favorite chair reading the Philip K Dick equivalent of a Mills & Boon. A guy’s got to have some romance outside of the replicant world, after all…
2. RAMBO DISCOVERS CROCHET
Vietnam messed him up so much that his PTSD started to really interfere with his life. Luckily, XXX Rambo engaged a life coach who introduced him to the wonders of knitting crafts. He soon found that he could get over his anger issues and engage with day-to-day society after an hour or so of crochet. And he’s made some really lovely shawls for his Nan.
3. LUKE SKYWALKER IS A SECRET GAMBLER
Sometimes, being so righteous gets right on Luke’s Jedi nerves. He misses the old days when he was allowed to get angry and act human. These days he has to waft around in a robe being all zen about everything and sometimes it gets too much. To help him cope with his holy duties, Luke has turned to online gambling. Careful to hide it from his disciples, he makes sure he gets his gambling fix. The online casino and pokies at Intertops gives him the thrills and spills he’s missing from the old days of fighting the Emperor – and he gets to make some cash. He’s actually considering jacking the whole Jedi thing in and turning pro…
4. BRIDGET JONES DISCOVERS MEDITATION
Finally fed up with her neurotic and tedious ways, Bridget’s friends snap and hold an intervention. Bored of her banging on about her weight and men problems, they club together and send her to a Tibetan monastery for a couple of weeks where she finds the calming serenity of mindful meditation. After a mere ten days of calm contemplation she realizes just how much she was wasting the opportunities life had thrown at her and decides to become a yoga instructor. Her friends are much relieved.
5. THE TERMINATOR LIKES LONG WALKS ON THE BEACH
Every now and again he just needs to wind down and stop trying to destroy the future of mankind. Being a relentless, emotionless killing machine can really get to you sometimes. A nice walk on the beach, preferably at dawn is all he needs to get his psycho back on. Everyone needs a break at some point. Back to it Arnie!
Guest post by: Adela